New Haircut-ness November 27, 2007
Posted by smartblondece in Pics.2 comments
I had not had a haircut since I got home in June. My hair grows at a decent rate too, so it was shoulder length. I got some money from Grandma and I went into the Salon today on break and got it cut. Pretty much what I had in June. I just showered and washed then styled it. It’s really cute and I am very happy with the new ‘do.
Right after it was cut, I have a bit more body when I style it!
Quarter Past One November 26, 2007
Posted by smartblondece in Weather, blah, writing.add a comment
I have the urge to write. I should be asleep. Sunday night I have class at 9 am. Instead I’m sitting in my dark room, not wanting to unplug the space heater to deprive myself of heat in the -3 C cold and fog, oh, and listening to Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me! (Best thing on radio). And I’m putting my mom’s Dixie Chicks CD (stole it, she doesn’t know yet) on to my iTunes Library. Why is it I always want to write at this hour. Two nights past it was on my story. The scene when a certain military leader comes to a certain adolescent girl trained in medicine to tell her that the medicine won’t come. Then the scene later (4 years later) when he talks to her about that conversation and first hints that his loyalties may not lay where many may think. I thought it came out well… but then again it was quarter past one.
About to cry November 20, 2007
Posted by smartblondece in blah, school.1 comment so far
This sucks balls. I am in AutoCAD. It’s just been a bad last 18 hours in general. I had to go get a shot. It is the type you can feel go in and hurts like a mother. I go home and work on AutoCAD for a while before I left for chapter. Got back from chapter and worked on more AutoCAD. Couldn’t get my alignments to work and gave up after an hour Realized that the work I had done earlier for ec was now worthless becuase I some how never did one of the homeworks and I have to do that now. So I nearly cried then at my own idiocy of somehow not remembering to do the homework and not remembering it being turned in. Since I was just then remebering that it existed. So I work on the homework… long and convoluded. Got it drawn and go to insert a layout and plot and it crashed on me. Three times. Gave up went to bed, set alarms for 8:30.
Wake up. It’s 10:20. No memory of turning off any of my THREE alarms. I have missed Math Recitation. Really not doing well in Math, but have been working my butt off to get caught up and now this. I sit there and cry, call my mom and cry. And get ready and into the lab, becuase then I can at least fix my stupid AutoCAD. I get one fixed just in time after a bit of trouble. The other I have a few minutes to do. Then it starts going bizerk. Not going to explain what happened but I eventually fixed it 20 minutes after class started. Walk to the front to hand it in and Jina (not her real name) says to me: “Next time wait til I’m done.” I understand I get it. But I am sooooo worn down from AutoCAD, math and business, then work on top of it all that all I want to do right now is cry from it all.
I might just disappear… November 8, 2007
Posted by smartblondece in God, Missing England, Technology, What?!, family, school.1 comment so far
Been thinking a bit lately. To be honest I’m not really happy right now. There are a few things I am identifying as reverse culture shock (it’s been 4 1/2 months but it is still happening) and a few things that are nothing to do with that. One of my little weights on my shoulder, is something I’ve dealt with a lot before. I have slightly addictive tendencies. Thankfully this has not brought itself out in anything nasty such as drugs or alcohol or sex or gambling or anything else you might go to an anon meeting for. No this seems to come out in tv, the internet, The Sims and other things where I have a tendency to turn off my brain. Frankly, this is NOT good given my current amazing profession as a STUDENT. I need my brain to stay on. And to actually focus. I have not been focusing lately. I have been doing very little focusing. This is something I struggle with and probably always will. Not ADD. I know what I need to do, I just generally avoid doing those things in favor of the addictions listed above.
I am happiest when I am productive, close to God (I’m a Christian, I don’t talk about it much. Don’t really feel I need to. But I may more sometime not so soon… yes there is a point to this rambling) and when I feel in control of my life. But right now I don’t feel like I do. In fact I don’t feel like any of those things. I do not feel on top of anything and here is my big reason. I am spending too much time on this computer, on my bed, watching TV. I am not happy. I’m NOT happy! So why does that feel so friggin’ good to type? I don’t want this to be my life. And here’s the thing. This, how I am living right now isn’t what I want.
And I don’t need Doctor Phil, any life coach, self help book, or Pastor to tell me what to do. I wish I could say God told me. But no, my mom told me. And not anytime recently. No, she told me everyday as I grew up and never directly (or at least never as it sunk in with verbal enforcement). If I want to change it only I can. I need to get up off my arse and actually do something. My mother gave me that common sense. And if I learned anything while I was in England it was this: My mom is generally right. OK, not always but when it comes to a lot of things it’s generally a good idea to listen to my mom, to look at what she does, or at what she would want me to do. My parents have raised me, offered me every opportunity, and not so this would be my life. No, they wanted better for me. And here’s the thing. I want better for me.
This isn’t working. What I’m doing now. It’s just not. So here it is. A radical idea this day in age, among people in our age group. I’m turning off the computer. Granted, I am also a college student so perhaps I need to qualify this statement. I need the computer, the internet ect… for my school work. I need it to communicate with my classmates and my profs. So, tonight I turn it off and I only turn it back on to do homework, and check e-mails. I’ll work something out with iTunes, since it’s kinda my version of the radio. Maybe have it on but not allow iTunes store shopping. I just know I need a radical change right now.
Why stop there. Justin recently told me I watch too much telly. And after all he’s right. No more. I get wrapped up in stories. Thankfully with novels you have to wait a while if it’s a series in progress, or it just ends. No these shows that I get addicted to, they go on and on. Each week a new installment. I’m breaking these addictions. I don’t need them. And I am better than this. I am better than this life I am in right now. And here’s the thing. The life I should have, the life I have worked hard to get is right here. So close that I kinda float through it each day. I am sick of this. And here’s another thing. I miss God. And He hasn’t really gone anywhere. I just haven’t talked to Him in a really long time. So here it goes, heres the plunge. And if you don’t see me for a while, if I disappear… it’s because I’m out living my life.
*Shaking head* November 6, 2007
Posted by smartblondece in Oregon, What?!.add a comment
If you are going to bother doing a localized commercial for a national company, please, PLEASE, check how to pronounce the names of the towns. I was watching TV just now and there was a State Farm commercial. They say: “For Gresham call Joe Blow. For Alo-HA call Kiss my Ass.” Geez, how hard is it to check the pronunciation of the town. I know it is spelled Aloha but in Oregon (because we have a zillion names that we are 1) impossible to pronounce correctly by looking at the word in the first place or 2) pronounced in a way you would NEVER expect.) we pronounce Aloha the town with a silent H. So, it’s ah-LOW-ah. How hard is it…
On another note. When cows fly: One did in Washington. Granted it was a brief glorious downward bound flight that resulted in her landing on the hood of a car.
Because Phillip Morris hates kids… And apparently Oregon does too. November 6, 2007
Posted by smartblondece in Oregon, What?!, blah.add a comment
Disclaimer: I am a hypocrite by most measures. I didn’t vote this time. I moved in August and I forgot to re-register… until 1 day after registration closed. In my credit I did vote while I was abroad. I did the whole absentee thing.
It is an Oregon mark of the fall. Kids go back to school. High School football games. And the election time advertising starts… This year was a record year for advertising spending, apparently. And I have to say it reached a new low. when you actually have Phillip Morris paying for advertisements you know it’ll be bad. What more, apparently we listen to them.
So, Measure 50. It was an amendment to the Oregon Constitution that would have created a new tobacco tax. This tobacco tax would have helped fund health insurance for uninsured kids. Granted the measure was kinda flawed but we would have worked out the kinks… it’s kinda what we do. Make a measure, implement it then pass 4 more measures over the next 10 years to amend it because the original was kinda flawed. Of course Phillip Morris didn’t want to pay for it in lost sales so they spend 20 million on advertising in Oregon (And we’ve had to watch it… Just for that I hate them) against this measure. And as I write this 60%-ish of the votes are counted and Measure 50 is failing by 60%. OK. I get some of the objections but does anyone actually think about who is paying for the advertisement???
Deer November 5, 2007
Posted by smartblondece in Animals, Friends, Navy, exercise, school.add a comment
The other night Kristin and I went out for a drive after working out. This ended up in us sitting up on Timberhill staring out at Corvallis. We were sitting there chatting when all of a sudden Kristin says, “Is there an animal out there?”
We turn on the head lights and right there, not 15 feet from us is this doe. She stares at us for a second and then walks down the hill. We were thinking that was pretty cool. We went back to talking until I saw the silhouette of antlers. “I think there’s a buck out there!”
Sure enough there was a big four point buck right where the doe had been. He followed her down the hill and we saw them again as they walked under the motion sensor lights of the house down below us. It was pretty cool.
We started working out again. Well, we only went once, on Saturday, but it was enough to get my motivation going.
On Thursday I was in Owen and I saw a flier for a navy program. I looked at it and I think I may have found something I would like to do. I’m a five year student. My family only will pay through my 4th year. The Navy Civil Engineering Corps has a scholarship that will pay E-3 pay scale (about $2000/month) while I’m in school, then after I will serve 4 years with the CEC. I would be an officer. 70% are stationed in the states, the other bases are Italy and Spain (!). The work is mostly manager level. This is what I want to do. And if the Navy is what gets me there then wonderful! I’m beginning to look at the application process. I have to get a hold of the guy in charge of the scholarship for this area.
